Summer Grilling Speech

I don’t know what you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for seasoning, I can tell you I don’t have spices. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for things like you. If you let my hunger go now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will grill you.

Epic Gotye Parody

Original Here.

Waldo The Movie – Official Trailer

Everyday I’m Shufflin

Doing Something Right

The other night, the Newt was expressing some concerns over someone breaking in our house through his bedroom window.  I explained to him that I’m here to protect him and that even with a ladder it would be pretty difficult and they would probably try someplace else easier.

“Not if they have a jet-pack.” he replied.

Seeing that his logic was sound, I had to concede that yes, if they had a jet-pack then maybe it was a possibility.

I came home from work last night and when I went to tuck him in, I found him asleep in his bed with his Nerf bat which he had written “Skull Cracker” on with a Sharpie, complete with a little skull. 😀

So let this be a warning to any jet-pack wearing burglars out there… Newt’s taking care of business.


Today was ‘Dress as Someone You Admire’ day at Newt’s school.

I hope Alan is happy.

Lays Loves Me


Venison Slider

Overheard at the Gun Counter

Customer: I need a box of forty.

Me: .40 Smith & Wesson? No problem.

Customer: No! .40 Ruger.

Me: Right. (I hand him the box.)

Next Customer: You get that a lot?

Me: (Sigh) Yeah…

So Tactical…

<Stingray> I’m so tactical I’ve got rails on my hog.



<wrm> I don’t think that’s *quite* what Stingray meant, Sal

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