Summer Grilling Speech

I don’t know what you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for seasoning, I can tell you I don’t have spices. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for things like you. If you let my hunger go now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will grill you.

R.I.P. Ray Bradbury

Ray Bradbury — author of The Martian Chronicles,Fahrenheit 451,Something Wicked This Way Comes, and many more literary classics — died this morning in Los Angeles, at the age of 91.

In case you were wondering, I was inspired to use Salamander as my online handle over 20 years ago, and it is in reference to the fire truck and symbol used by Guy Montag and the other firemen in Fahrenheit 451.

Always Remember

Never Forget.

Epic Gotye Parody

Original Here.

El Kabong!

Rabid mountain lion in attack mode no match for Chino Valley man and his frying pan

The first time I had a clear shot I just swung the pan and hit him right on the head,” Arnold said. “It was like a cartoon – he just kind of stopped and I hit him again. He got stiff and fell over.

Buzz Saw Blade Crossbow

He Played Too Much Angry Birds

“A Colorado man who shot a woman in the head after mistaking her red Mohawk hairdo for a bird has been placed on probation, authorities say.”

“Rockwell, who was banned from owning a gun for a 1995 attempted burglary conviction, told police he had gone outside with his .22-caliber rifle Oct. 5 to shoot a bird that had been harassing his cats. He shot once at what he thought was a red bird on a hilltop about 90 feet away, then heard a woman moaning in pain. He discovered a 23-year-old woman with a head wound.”

Shooter says he mistook woman for bird

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